Wednesday, March 10, 2010

I'm heading back to http://khloee.blogspot.com yet again.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Don't blog when you really got nothing to say.

Actually there's too much to say till I don't know how to blog it out.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Getting back into action.

If nothing seems to go the right way, I'll go the way to make it right!
The reverse effect!

Kind of sick of the feeling for the past one week.
It's complicated, I thought I was hallucinating.

Anyway, I had an average weekend.
Gastric for 2 days and almost 3 makes it bad enough to even make me feel positive for the weekend activities.
I tried that goat milk, it felt so much better.

Maybe goat milk is my only solution now.
I've tried years of medication..
Thanks ppl who are with me all these days, especially my new friend, Jason, who happens to be my neighbour. Yea, like you said.. Its mystical.

I'm gonna fix my speaker by changing the wire.
I haven't been inputting music into my life all these months.
The tension and the stress, I almost give up everything.
At least singing and listening to music helps to soothe one's mind..

And the recent event with a friend.
I'm determine enough to watch him change. Because I never believe in impossible.

All these years,.. I had enough.
I'm gonna make this a turning point in my life to change something.
Not forgetting my 3 years plan from now, or probably start of next year..
& all my motivations to my goals and dreams I used to have.

I'm still finding back what I am.
It takes time. Maybe I won't be what I was before.. At least for the better and new Khloe.
I've been telling myself so much but nothing is done. (bang wall, lol)

I hope I can, I think I can, and I can.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

I've seriously lost my soul.
It was gone since the
start of the year.


Who can find it back?
Maybe contacting is a mistake.
Maybe asking a favour is a big mistake.

I've already lost myself these days.
I'm really trying my best.. To get myself numb of that feeling.
History will be repeating again.

I hope not. Really not.
I've waited for almost 2 years.
Not gonna lose it once more.


I shall not initiate this time.
I'm tired.
Tired of testing and trying to find out the truth.
Full of high hopes, full of pain.
I don't know what am I expecting.
I don't know what I truly want.
I don't know what else to say..

All I want to see is happiness.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Am I doing for the sake of it or am I loving it?

I always don't seem that things go right, not because of my feelings but it is not right.
Maybe all along that feeling has already died off.

Should I drag on with it?
Or should I quit?

I need some wisdom.
I had enough.

Enough of my life.
I decided to end it.

Nope, I'm not killing myself.
I decided to draw a line and a fullstop to all these nuisance.

I'm looking for the old Khloe.
The one I was before.

Someone who has full of energy, perseverance, determination and passion.
Someone who opens up for everything, extrovert, and I don't know what else to describe.
I was once an amazing person.

Give me time.
I'll be back.

I'm gonna collect my precious treasure this Saturday and things shall change after that.

Thanks to someone.
I've finally found my senses.

Truly to say..
There's no coincidence in the world but an underlying reason for whatever things that happen.
I feel I'm a nuisance.
To almost everyone.

Probably you people don't really feel that way but I feel it.



I decided not to say much anymore.

This is for sure.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

I'm blogging through my Nintendo Wii. Very lazy to sit down and stay at my computer.

Insomia loves me. But not the other way round. I've not been sleeping early for past 2 years, imagine that. I've not seen the morning sun more than 20times in the past 2 years, kill me please.

I can't take any naps. Zz...

Anyway.. I'm quite motivated and happy these days. Too much words to describe what happened for the last few days.

People change, me too.
But there's something I can't really describe after having a conversation with someone. Something very familiar, something new, something that makes me feel there's a distance yet close. I don't know.
Something that tells me, give up, it's already over, move on.
Something that tells me to stay this way.
Something that tells me it's impossible, because we belong to two different words.

I always believe things happen for a reason. Like someone who mentioned to me in buddhist practice: There is no coincidence but a underlying reason for each cause.

Perhaps so.
But what's the reason?
I ought to know.


_____________________________

I'm suppose to blog something else but I'm lost for words.
Whats up with me today since morning? Probably its that weird dream... It really affect me a lot (lol). I seriously wonder what does it mean..